Twitter: LateNightJimmy: RT @jimmyfallon: Thank you, people who say the phrase, “I really shouldn’t,” for letting me know you’re about to eat a lot of my fries. …

LateNightJimmy: RT @jimmyfallon: Thank you, people who say the phrase, “I really shouldn’t,” for letting me know you’re about to eat a lot of my fries. …
Twitter / LateNightJimmy

Twitter: LateNightJimmy: Thank you, people who say, “Wow, you’re really photogenic,” for not saying what you really mean: “Wow, you’re really ugly in person.”

LateNightJimmy: Thank you, people who say, “Wow, you’re really photogenic,” for not saying what you really mean: “Wow, you’re really ugly in person.”
Twitter / LateNightJimmy

Twitter: LateNightJimmy: The White House is spending 250k/year on calligraphy. You’re spending too much money on calligraphy when you spend ANY money on calligraphy.

LateNightJimmy: The White House is spending 250k/year on calligraphy. You’re spending too much money on calligraphy when you spend ANY money on calligraphy.
Twitter / LateNightJimmy

Twitter: LateNightJimmy: “Thank you, Lobsters, for always looking like you’re putting things in quotes.” #thankyounotes #lnjf http://t.co/3FiIP5R3

LateNightJimmy: “Thank you, Lobsters, for always looking like you’re putting things in quotes.” #thankyounotes #lnjf http://t.co/3FiIP5R3
Twitter / LateNightJimmy